The Things She Says

With less than a week to go until the due date, I'm trying to soak in all of Mariah's hilarious toddler goodness while it's just the two of us. (I say "toddler goodness" today because she actually slept through the night and just finished cutting her last set of two year molars. Hoooorrayyyy!")

Church is always an adventure. She was standing on the pew bobbing her head to one of the hymns, and as the music ended she loudly proclaimed, "Awww, I no can't dance anymore!!"

There was one Sunday where we had to take her out early because every time there was a pause or silence she would shout, "HAPPY New Year!"

One of her nursery leaders came and grabbed me near the end of church and said, "You might want to follow Mariah, she just opened the nursery door and bolted out saying "I go potty, and DON'T FOLLOW ME!!"

She's been saying this weird phrase for the last couple weeks, where out of nowhere she says, "I feel nervous...........(dramatic pause)...........about Jesus." (??????)

Every, single, night for Mariah's entire life I've sang her "I am a Child of God" as I put her to sleep. Now we usually just do one verse if any at all, but for over a year we sang at least 3 verses, sometimes many many many times while I rocked her to sleep as an infant. So I had to laugh when a couple weeks ago I was holding her, singing, about to lay her down and she perks up and looks at me and says, "Hey Mom!! Nice Child of God song!!"

She has this thing with privacy that is both frustrating and highly entertaining. She demands privacy while holding up a hand to block her face (from the paparazzi?) at times that are fairly normal like using the toilet (she makes sure we shut the door, but then leave it open a crack to check that we're waiting right outside) and also at times that make no sense at all, like when I'm trying to get her pajamas on and she runs naked into the hallway shouting "prrriiiicyy pleeease!!!"

A couple times I've gone in to her room in the morning to get her out of her crib and she is standing there with an arm extended and says, "Oh hi Mommy! Nice to meet you!"

Almost every night since Halloween, right before she goes to sleep she lifts up her head while I'm walking out of her bedroom and says "Guess what."
"What?"
"Happy Halloween."
"Happy Halloween to you too. Go to sleep, goodnight."
"Santa says Ho ho ho!, and Happy New Year!"
I hope this continues through the whole year and she has every holiday in there by the time Halloween rolls around again. It makes me laugh every time,  except for at 2 am when she wakes up hollering for me to come in, and all she has to say is "Mom. Happy new year."

Awhile ago I was pulling clothes out of the dryer and Mariah came up and tackled me from behind, strangling my neck, so I told her, "Ouch! Mariah, that hurt, you need to say sorry." And she said, "Sorry... for fun!"

She thinks "I just kidding" is an acceptable response to getting in trouble for hitting or throwing things. I say, "That's not funny, you hurt me when you hit." And she insists "It IS funny mom! I just kidding!"

She also assures me right as her finger is entering her nose, "Mom, Riah NOT be gross, Riah be funny!!"

Also funny to me: she loves her shadow. When she notices it, she says hi to it, talks to it, tickles it, tries to touch it but then gets frustrated saying, "Shadow, hard to reach it you!" She literally chases her shadow around in the early morning and evening, and gets sad and annoyed when it disappears into the light, so she has to find the right places where she can see it on the floor or against the wall. I have overheard her having little conversations with her shadow that go like this "Hi shadow. I play with you. Now stay here with me."

Mariah is really into having "favorites" and when she really likes something she quickly declares that it is her favorite. Currently, her favorite piece of mail is Consumer Reports, her favorite mode of transportation is the elevator in our apartment building, her favorite book is "Getting Ready for Baby", her favorite letter is W, her favorite color is purple,  her favorite food is whatever she is eating, her favorite song is "Rockabye Bear." She updates me on these things every single day. Nobody has ever accused her of having too few opinions.

She still loves kissing and hugging and has this little routine that she does where she goes up to the object of her affection (the daily recipients are the car, the elevator door, her stuffed animals, daddy, her baby doll, and says, "Kiss (leans in for a kiss), now hug (smooshes her face against it) awww, so nice."

You know how they say with opinionated toddlers to always give options to let them feel like they're making a choice...Mariah has turned that one around on us too. She knows she's not allowed to bring toys in her crib, so before nap time she hurries and grabs two toys and says "Mom, you pick one for me. Make good choices."

She loves coming to prenatal appointments with me and trying to impress the midwifes with all of her medical knowledge. She comes in and says stuff like, "Hi midwife. check the belly baby sister. Mommy step on a scale. Now measure." She made my midwife laugh when she walked in and Mariah was laying on the table with her shirt up and she said, "Put the glue on my belly now!" She was referring to the ultrasound gel they squeeze on hahaha.

Other fun times at midwife visits: the first time I had an internal exam I started undressing, and Mariah (probably recalling the only times she's had to take off her pants in public) looks at me with an understanding, sympathetic face and says, "Oh noooo, mommy, you did pee pees in yours pants? That's toooo bad."
At another exam, she would not accept that my pants had to stay off and as the midwife was coming back in the room, Mariah was carrying on about "Mom, keep yours cwothes ON!! Here take yours pants!" (while she's shoving my pants back in my lap and trying to take off the privacy blanket.
At my most recent visit, as we pulled in to the parking lot, Mariah asked, "Mom, PWEESE no take off yours cwothes at midwife's house." Lucky for her, it was a pants-on day.
When I had to leave a "sample" in the restroom, after watching me pee in the cup and put it on the tray she said "Oh Mom, good job making juice!"

She talks in double (and sometimes triple) negatives all the time, which I should probably discourage but I think it's kind of cute. She says things like "Hey moon! I no can't reach it you too high in the sky!" and "Oh no! Where's my baby doll I no don't can't find it!"

She talks about her feelings, which are both abundant and ever-changing, with pretty impressive skill. She identifies to me when she is frustrated, sad, happy, excited, nervous, and mad. She also points out to me what I'm feeling and tries to guess why. "Mommy you feel sad...you miss Daddy? Forgot to give him kiss this morning?" The last few days I've been sick with a cold and she constantly asks, "You feel okay? Still sick? It's ok, Riah's here. I help you feel better." She is really sweet and empathetic to me, and to her friends also. Nothing makes me prouder than seeing her trying to comfort a crying friend by offering words of advice, some jokes, and offering to share toys.

Mariah is so incredibly excited for baby sister to get here, she talks about her every single day and tells us all sorts of stuff. She says she has black hair and brown eyes. She collects toys for her to play with ("When baby sister gets here, I play this with her, okay??"). When strangers make a comment to her about becoming a big sister soon she goes through this whole spiel: "When baby sister comes, Mommy and Daddy go to hospital. together. Then Riah goes to friends house. Baby sister comes out, then Mommy Daddy come back to get me!! I hold the baby sister!"